$

I'M SUPER BROKE for the moment that I couldn't even afford a RM12 belt I wanted. Although it IS a necessity since my belt looked so worn out right now. But sigh I won't die without it right so I choose to let it go T_T

Gosh when will all the money come back to me! T_T
The only turnoff doing freelance job is the duration of waiting for the moolah to come T_T
2 months 3 months 4 months until god knows when T_T

Believe it or not, I didn't visit any blogshop for an entire month! Gosh it used to be my daily routine okay D: But I finally gave up yesterday. Nothing much I really fancy but I would consider getting it T_T

Current motto: "Stop. Look. and X the effing window!"

-

Got the results yesterday. It was pretty much so-so only since I didn't pass with flying colors. I should've pray for getting A's and B's instead :x I'm now feeling much better rather than being paranoid and insecure. I'm saying this cos I couldn't sleep on the previous night until 5am T_T

-

I still didn't like college as much cos it's bastardized with fuckfaces. Screw college life.

Dusty

Believe it or not, this is actually my first time cleaning the CPU's fan O_o no wonder it always shuts down automatically! It's not completely clean yet cos I don't dare to disassemble the entire thing just in case I couldn't put it back ya i know i suck in dealing with computers T_T

-

Chuck Bass: "I love you 2. I love you 3. I love you 4..."

aww//

I'm back

I'm finally free from all these crazy roadshows! But I can see college waving hysterically at me. Oh hai college life againnnnnn!

I have no regrets or whatsoever but pls just issue me the pay as soon as possible T_T
I'm still effing broke even though I've been washing dishes working like mad cow. Took some piccies today and too bad okm wasn't there cos everyone likes him hahahaha anyway thanks to the crazy working hours, now I'm fighting dehydration, weight gain, sucky skin condition, and I think a tad bit of constipation watheff.

For a moment, I think home-based job rocks socks! I can finally wear slippers and sandals after a month of wearing shoes/flats. No more dress code! No more annoying boss! :DDD

Got to see many people from different corner of the globe. Made 2 China friends.
Practiced some China, Indonesian and European accent. Krazii.

Eeps

I stink like you now. Gotta go shower.

Wanted. Real Cash.

I get mad at my eyes sometimes. I have monolids and uses tapes and everyone knows about that.
It don't do me any good when I always woke up late :x and have no enough time to do my eye. I mean, make up D:

And recently, I'll end up looking like this O_o cos the tapes weren't stuck perfectly T_T

O___o

So don't ask me why are my bangs covering my right eye if you see me sometimes.
Employers nowadays made it a rule that every girl have to makeup to work. So superficial T_T

Why...........!

I felt awkward typing this post thus the weird language. Been abandoning my blog cos I'm juggling between jobs. I can be washing dishes at some random coffee shop at night.

Aduh. cash pls.

11 more episodes.

Missing!

You guys may or may not know why I've been MIA so much lately.
I'm slaving my fatty ass out - working. Thus all those random feet aching shoutouts @ fb.
It's horrible and I'm ashamed of my own feet now T_T sigh why I'm not born hot enough for modeling jobs I don't have to stand so long for good pay!

Semester's starting in another week. I'll be back by then, I think.

Tatas. 12 eps to go.
aja-aja huaiting!

Filled with love.

Happy cos besties and bf dropped by during work!

:DD

mamamia

Tututu.


No macro pic of the dimsums. I forgot, bleh.




Kiamsiap strawberries!



It always seems like it's her birthday instead of everyone else's.
Lol 4 birthday men and woman. And 2 moms.


Happy Mom's Day everyone!

Foodilicious

The porridge, puddings, soya bean, lo hon ko, and some kuih are out of this pic.

Just okm and me to finish everything O_o

Food is good for the soul. It makes you happy! At least for me :O
Keep eating. Just beware of the breeding lipid.

And I think KMC is drooling.
:D

-

I hate dreams; those you had while you're sleeping.
It's okay when it's a nice one. But all I get was crazy fucked up dreams.

And I couldn't tell whether it's real or unreal on the first few minutes I'm awake.
Basicly, I always wake up feeling worried because I thought it was real.

It's tiring.

-

It sucks when someone thinks they're so great and you actually wanted to slap them back into reality, or even better just slap them on the face. A tight one.

I wanted to express what I'm really going through right now but it wouldn't be appropriate for me to post it here. It's too tensed up and dramatic, with a dash of awkwardness at the same time. I know what to post and what not to post. Unlike some people.

Anyways, I should be feeling very emotional and should be locking myself in a room. But I didn't.
In fact, I'm needing someone to talk to me right now. Attention seeker. No not really. I don't just talk to anyone at this phase. I'm sorry if I just brushed any of you guys off. I'm trying to refrain myself from hurting anyone with my words. I know I'm effing harsh and mean, don't have to remind me again :D thankyouverymuch.

I have insomnia. I couldn't sleep even at 5am this morning. Also, I'm hyper-tensed. I woke up at 8am feeling scared and nervous for NO reason at all. It might be caused of the nightmare, but I think it's due to the worries I had. I couldn't calm myself down. I walked here and there, I cried, I rolled on the bed hugging my pillows...It didn't work. Until I started playing with games in my loyal phone; Zuma, lol. And when I stopped playing, the fear came again. It was crazy, really.
I started reorganizing my wardrobe keeping myself busy for an entire hour until I forgot about it. Had lunch at 10am. Went back to bed at 11am. Woke up at nearly 4pm.

Awhile ago, almost died suffocating from the increasing pulse. Okay I'm just exaggerating. It did not felt like dying, it's torturing. My hands trembled. Did some breathe in breathe out thingamajig while applying toner and patting moisturizer to my face. I think it got better. But apparently it didn't cos I went to wash my face AGAIN. Goodbye my wasted toner and moisturizer ._.

I'm sorry mom. I was a bad child awhile ago. But I couldn't take it anymore. I did not feel guilty nor remorseful of what I did. I believe I was right. Sorry for making you feeling bad on a day before the Mother's Day. I know pretty pearls and pink carnations or red roses won't make up for what happened earlier. (I'm too shy to actually hug you and say sorry. I know, I suck.)

I wasn't blind of what's happening all this while. I understand each and every single thing around me. I didn't say a word just because I know I have no power and no stand; nobody will help me.
Let's just assume that I'm wrong, but...are they really entirely right? The problems never stop torturing me because everyone's avoiding it and nobody wanted to say anything clearly.

Seriously I don't have to go through all this. Why am I giving myself such big pressure? I don't know. I just wanted to be happy, like I always said.

I have this weird thought when I had the attack.
"Will I die early?"

Yes yes touchwood.
I have no idea what I'm saying too.
You know it's hard when you wanted to talk to someone, but you couldn't somehow tell the entire story.

I don't need a doctor.
'cos I'm just way too pressured.

Oh yes. Thanks for the booze, Cyn. Although it was days ago. It was good.
okm, thanks for the icecream. You know I love them more than anything else edible.

Belgian choco. Black sesame.

BTW.
This is not a suicide note -_-!

Monopoly

A gathering without Jci. I'm going to kick her out of the clan already srsly T_T

A little booze, a sudden gathering, and major monopoly game. w00t :D






The generous amount of tissue papers that Cyn used :D
Also, Jess' blackberry phone wtf

It was almost perfect, look who didn't join us!

T_T

Take a break.

I'm giving my feet a break after an entire week.


Hiong Kong Kiok.



More Hiong Kong Kioks



Krispy Kreme. Long story on how it became my lunch.




Lazy bumbum.